Dear Dark Lord,

          I have done your bidding, Oh Great One. The cat is dead. I buried it by the sea, where your evil waters could scoop up its remains. As you requested, Whiskers' soul was very much alive as I piled the sand over his purring face. He is now, as I have always been, your servant in the Eternal War.

Devoted Forever,
Craig Thompson

Craiggers,

          It's me. The devil. What's going on up there? You buried your cat? Dude, I just said he was a nice cat, and that I'd like to get one of my own someday. I didn't mean for you to . . . well, what's done is done I guess. Listen, I was wondering if you told anyone about our meeting. I realized as soon as I got back down here that maybe I should have been a little clearer about any further instructions. Let me know, when you get a chance, what you've been saying--I've really got to let my PR guy know what to expect.

Thanks,
Dark Lord

Dear Dark Lord,

          I received your last message, and set out to spread your Word. At school, I took control of a D.A.R.E. assembly, and preached your Gospel to a mostly bewildered crowd. Truly, I believe your beautiful visions of a torture-filled wonderland were lost on most of the brainwashed audience. Not enough of them showed the adequate fear and respect for you that I felt they should have; then again, I am sure they will be the first to suffer when you have decided the time is right. On the positive side, I have ingratiated myself with a small clique of Marilyn Manson fans, though I think they were already Believers. I am now awaiting your next instructions, as I sharpen the blades and feast on the worms.

Yours,
Craig Thompson

Craig,

          Hey, man, slow down. I think you might be rushing with this stuff a little bit. Now I know when one gets excited about something, they want to scream it from the mountaintop, but . . . this is a touchy subject with a lot of people, you know? You might want to just stop talking about me altogether, for the time being. Go see a movie or something--try and balance the Satanism with some happier shit. I mean, Christ, I'd go crazy down here if I was always, you know, "Doom and Gloom and Flames!" and what have you. Like yesterday I started out the day pretty evil, but then I took a couple hours in the afternoon (what I call 'me time') to watch that movie with Tom Hanks and the girl from Cheers. You know the one? Where the house falls apart. Great stuff--of course I'd see anything Hanks is in (As far as I'm concerned, he's the new Jimmy Stewart).

          Do you see where I'm going with all this, Craig? Demons and damnation are great . . . but you've got to moderate. OK? So I look forward to your next letter, and I hope you've got good news for me.

Sincerely,
Dark Lord

P.S. You know 'feasting on worms,' is not literally 'feasting on worms,' don't you?

Dear Dark Lord,

          As I have not received a letter from you since I sent my last one--two days ago--I can only assume that I should continue as planned. I have begun to prepare for the sacrifice of the Virgin Child--Gina--and at night, while she sleeps, I have been making tiny slices with a razor on her vulnerable flesh. Since she is not old enough to speak yet, my parents have not noticed my deeds, but I can see that the loss of blood is beginning to prepare her mind for The Beyond. She sleeps most of the day now, and I am relegated to lurking in the shadows, waiting for stolen moments to change her ruddy-colored sheets. I fear that Mom and Dad will catch on soon, however, so I hope Your Holiness believes the time for her fateful deliverance to you is nigh. Until I hear word from your sacred lips, I await in obedience.

Your Servant,
Craig Thompson

Craig!

          Urgent! Urgent! I hope you get this letter and read it VERY CAREFULLY. Do not . . . I REPEAT, DO NOT KILL YOUR SISTER! In fact, stop harming her at all. That is not what I want you to do. I command you to leave her alone, and I will not be happy if you hurt her again. Understood? I will give you the sign when you are to do my bidding. Got it? Please re-read this paragraph, and make sure you comprehend all of this. If you have any question about it, you can give me a call at 666-HELPP. (Leave off the last P for Pain, and leave off the second to last P for Promiscuity, and then add on an L for . . . Linda Lavin.) Call me! We need to talk.

Don't kill anyone!
Dark Lord

Dear Dark Lord,

          Our phone conversation cleared a lot of things up for me. You will be happy to know that Gina is healing quite nicely, and has almost completely stopped vomiting around the clock. I feel so ashamed that I misunderstood your orders, and promise to follow them to the letter in the future. I have ceased spreading The Word, and only practice your Hymns in the privacy of my bedroom. I am still bound to your desires, and will wait patiently for your next correspondence.

Your Servant,
Craig Thompson

Craig,

          It's good to hear we're on the same page now. And don't feel so bad about the misunderstanding--just a bit of overzealousness on your part. Trust me, there will be time for bloodshed, and when that time comes, you will most certainly be one of my most faithful helpers. For the time being, I recommend you play more of an active role in your community. A boy your age should be thinking about two things: getting good grades, and spending time with girls (maybe not in that order--ha ha.) Anyway, let me know how you're doing.

Your Buddy,
Dark Lord

P.S. Have you tried the new Crispy M&Ms? At first I thought they were kind of gay, but they're beginning to grow on me. Check them out!

Dear Dark Lord,

          Sorry it's been awhile since I wrote you, but I took your advice to heart. I loosened up a little, joined the Yearbook Staff, and met this cute freshman named Donna. We hit it off right away. You'd like her; she's a lot like you. She's funny. She likes Tom Hanks movies. And she's co-editor of the yearbook, but she doesn't act all mean and omnipotent (she takes all that power in stride--just like somebody else I know). Anyway, we've been dating a lot lately, so I haven't had a lot of time to do my Home Worship Exercises. But, like you said, all in moderation, right? So drop me a line, Oh Lord of Darkness.

Your Servant,
Craig Thompson

P.S. Donna was really into you too, a couple years ago, but she says she likes George Clooney now.

Craig,

          LOL on the "Lord of Darkness" bit. It's Dark Lord. You remember? Guess somebody doesn't have time to remember who his Supreme Ruler is anymore. Ha, ha. No, but, I'm really happy for you.

          This Dina girl sounds great. So I guess you have been spending a lot of time together, huh? That's . . . that's great. And, you know, hell, I'd be into George Clooney too if I was a slutty little teenage girl. Just joking.

          You know, I'm not a fad. I mean, I've been around since the beginning of time, so, I'm not sure I understand this "being into me for a while" thing. That seems a little patronizing on your little girlfriend's part, doesn't it? Strange. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that you're so happy with her, she sounds like a dream! Careful I don't steal her away from you! Ha ha. Or somebody else doesn't! Or she doesn't become fickle about you too, and drop you for some television-doctor-looking pimp. I'm sure that wouldn't happen, though, right?

          So, good luck with the girl. Write me when you get this. We should probably talk a little bit more about your First Mission. I believe it's time.

Your Master,
Dark Lord

D.L.,

          Oh, man, do I owe you an apology. It's been like eight months, I know, and I've been meaning to write you back. It's just been really crazy up here. You know how that goes. Donna and I are getting pretty serious, and I've been throwing myself into my schoolwork, so . . . it's just been hard to sit down and write this. And then, you know, I feel guilty 'cause I know it's been awhile since I wrote, and, well . . . I just wanted you to know I'm still here.

          I've been thinking a lot about what your plans are for this world and . . . hold on a second. Shit. That's Donna. We're supposed to go to this thing tonight, and we're already late as it is. Listen, I got to go, like, right now, but I need to tell you . . .

          Don't have time to finish now. Sorry for the incomplete sentences, but I wanted to stick this in the mail tonight so you get it. I'll write back real soon. Promise.

Yours,
C. Thompson

Dear "C,"

          This is "D.L." Better known as Dark Lord. In fact, only known as Dark Lord. It's a name that inspires fear in the weak, the strong, the good, and the evil. It's a powerful name. You might choose to abbreviate yours (as I see you have), but let's have a little respect for the Father of Fallen Angels, OK?

          I want you to know I'm a little disappointed in you, Craig. Frankly, this last year--not hearing a peep from you--I began to question to whom your loyalties belong. I can appreciate your devotion to your cheerleading harlot, but you MUST keep your priorities straight. We are, after all, in the War of Souls, and I need to know if you are willing to lay down your life for the Dark Triumph.

          I want you to regroup, you fucking bastard, and remember who made you what you are. It was ME. That's the DARK LORD, prick. Now I WILL NOT be put on hold again. You WILL respond to me immediately. I am your LORD.

Your LORD,
DARK...LORD

P.S. DARK LORD. Any correspondence to D.L. will be quickly burned, turned into ash, and sprinkled on the fresh grave of your girlfriend.

Dear Dark Lord,

          I have been amiss. Forgive my temporary impunity. I see now the error of my ways. As an illustration of my eternal dedication to your glory, I have butchered Donna into a thousand tiny pieces and enclosed some of them in this FedEx Letter. I am now awaiting my next orders.

Your Dutiful Servant,
Craig Thompson

Craig,

          I got your "skin package." Um . . . from what I could make out, under the blood stains, you're back on board. And I'm happy about that. On the other hand, I think what you have done to show your loyalty is a bit, well, rash. Methinks we're back to square one here. Now, do you think maybe you could hold off on murdering anybody until I ask you too? I mean, Jesus, I've got your girlfriend all over my lap now, and . . . it's just messy. How long did something like this take anyway? Forget it. I don't want to know.

          See, this is how it's going to work. I give you an order, you follow it. No improvisation on your part, OK? Not that I don't appreciate the gesture, but . . . a simple signature in blood has always sufficed. This is a big fucking signature.

          So . . . maybe we should break off contact for awhile. Why don't you go back to the normal parts of your life, and I'll let you know when I need you. Deal?

Sincerely,
Dark Lord

              Dedicated to the memory of:
				
              Donna DeLinelac, Co-Editor
              Peter Walters, Co-Editor
              Stuart Bilderbach, Editor-in-Chief
              Mrs. Esther O'Reilly,
              Staff Liaison to Yearbook


                    TABLE OF CONTENTS

* Demonic Graduation.............................. p. 2
* Class of '99: A Dark Look Back................. pp. 4-5
* Senior Photos................................... p. 6
* Senior Obituaries.............................. pp. 7-13
* Juniors, Sophomores, Freshmen: Pics & Obits.... pp. 14-32
* The Prom: A Night To Last Forever............... p. 33
* The Omen IV: The Awakening...................... p. 34
* Foto Funnies................................... pp. 35-40
* Bloody Spirit Days............................. pp. 41-42
* The Gospel of the DARK LORD.................... pp. 43-102
* Sports.......................................... p. 103
* Student Life................................... pp. 104-110
* School Sponsors................................ pp. 111-117
* Grover Cleveland Thespians Present:
	"Oliver!"................................. p. 118
	"A Winter's Tale"......................... p. 119
	"Angel Heart: The Musical"............... pp. 120-131
* A Wistful Look Back............................. p. 132
* Our Doomed Future............................... p. 133


Go Grover Cleveland Devils!